Stumbling into Our Dreams #writing #amwriting #author #writerslife

Have you ever had something bad happen that turned out to be the best thing that could have happened to you? The dream that emerged when the dust settled and you’re left with nothing, but the thoughts that had the worst not happened, you wouldn’t be now living in your best?

I have.

Psalm 112:4, “When darkness overtakes the righteous, light will come bursting in.”

Did you read that? Light will come bursting in. Suddenly and unexpectedly, God in His goodness can just turn everything around—which is exactly what He did for me.

Back in December of 2008, due to the ever-growing financial crisis in Nevada, my Dad’s company had to downsize and I was going to lose my source of income. I had started working for the family business in 1999, and spent the last 11 years managing all the accounting, insurance, payroll, taxes, receivables, payables, etc. I loved my job and I was good at it. I felt like it was what I was put on the this earth to do. Even if I loathed math in school, when I got into the world of accounting, numbers became a game I passionately played. I almost loved it when things didn’t balance because accounting is like a complex puzzle that not every one can put together. I could.

Because I was losing my income, it was time to put the oldest in daycare and find a job here in Oklahoma. Instead of doing the newspaper, online application job hunt bit, I went to a placement agency. Within a day they had me in for an interview, and within 2 days, I had a job with The Professional Basketball Club, L.L.C. or as more commonly known, the Oklahoma City Thunder professional basketball team. Yes, that’s right. I was hired at the Accounts Payable Manger for the Oklahoma City Thunder.

I started the job in January of 2009, training with the woman I was replacing since she wasn’t making the move from Seattle. There were six ladies in the accounting department—the Controller, the Assistant Controller, the Staff Accountant, the Accounts Receivable Specialist, the Accounts Payable Manager, and the Accounts Payable Specialist. When I first started, the Controller and Assistant Controller were still in the process of finding their replacements as they, like the woman I was replacing, weren’t staying in Oklahoma. Within a few months, the new women were hired and finally the department was complete with five other women who I thought of with high regard.

Well….for awhile, I did.

After the company replaced all the ladies who were moving back to Seattle, the team was set. A mass collection of personalities, all but one of us were married and I was the only one with children. All of us were young and from Oklahoma, and we worked together day in and day out. We laughed, we argued, we talked about home, family, work, and books—all the subjects normal co-workers talk about on a daily basis when spending so much time with together.

I loved that job. I enjoyed the work. I enjoyed the company.

And, then it happened.

For, what I am certain was for personal reasons, I was written out of the budget. My position was eliminated, and I was out of a job. Just 8 short months later, August 27, 2008, I was walking out of the building with my desk in a box after being embarrassingly kicked out of my office without even the chance to say good-bye to anyone. I suppose in the end, that was a blessing. Those ladies weren’t my friends. They didn’t care anything about me, and quite honestly, I always felt like they really didn’t like me. A couple of them I couldn’t tell you the reason why, and a couple, I knew from day one our personalities just weren’t going to mesh well long term—especially the Controller and Assistant Controller.

I suppose in hind-sight, I should have seen the pink slip coming, but I didn’t.

So there I was, lying in bed two weeks later wondering what in the world I was going to do. While the job market was decent, I had yet to get a call about my resume or even go in for an interview. I knew my unemployment wouldn’t last long and we had bills to pay. Of course, I went back to the placement agency, but they didn’t have anything that paid enough.

I was lost.

Looking back on that moment knowing what I know now, I wasn’t lost. I was actually standing in the hallway and God was just about to open my next door.

For several months prior to that fateful day, I kept thinking, and had even mentioned to the Husband, how I wanted to write a children’s book. I had an idea that I thought was cute and marketable, and I had always wanted to write. Of course, with the idea of a children’s book, the idea of a full length adult novel also kept creeping into my thoughts, which I pushed aside every single time. Sure, the thought of writing a full novel tickled every bit of my happy little imagination, I didn’t think I could actually do it.

After I was laid off from the Oklahoma City Thunder, I was very bitter for a long time. I resented the women I worked with for how they treated me and I resented the Controller for how my termination went. I knew she played a huge role in having my position written out of the budget. With such a contrasting personality, it’s no wonder we didn’t get a long. Not to say she was a bad person, but anyone in their 30’s who asks her employees to call her “Princess” just isn’t going to be a very good friend of mine.

I have since learned, however, that I shouldn’t have been bitter or resentful. While they did treat me in a completely awful way, them purposely getting rid of me was the best thing that happened to me. God shut the door of to that awful job so He could open the door to my new career.